Your Belief Patterns can affect Your Quest for Love and Lasting Relationship.
Your belief patterns run your life more than you think. And in the realm of relationships, this is no exception.
.
It’s common for couples to feel disconnected from their partners. With divorce becoming a normal everyday occurrence, there is more need than ever to make your relationship a priority. But another date night isn’t going to fix things.
Confidence, trust and communication are three key ingredients in maintaining a healthy relationship.
Your relationship isn’t going to be headed anywhere without open communication, especially if you’re looking to fix a relationship that has gone downhill. Even though you love each other, you are having trouble connecting on different levels and can’t understand how to make the other person happy.
What if the secret to improving your romantic relationships lies in improving your spiritual health?
.
No, I’m not suggesting that you go on a couples’ retreat with your church. That’s a nice idea, but to really have a great connection with your partner, you need to understand your own beliefs about relationships.
.
All of us have beliefs about how we should relate to the world and, consequently, our partners. We think that we have to behave a certain way in order to get love and positive attention.
.
These spiritual beliefs often colour our everyday lives, and we operate based on them.
.
However, these same belief patterns can also create distance between yourself and those you love. They often seem like they are helping us get what we want, but actually they can lead toward the opposite outcome. .
.
Our belief patterns can cause us to manipulate reality and make it into the enemy.
There are five major belief patterns that most of us operate through.
.
Each belief pattern has the goal of seek inglove and affection, but can quickly turn into a “me against them” attitude and ends up backfiring.
In essence, when we seek love and approval outside of ourselves, we always miss the mark.
Figuring out which belief is affecting your relationship is key to creating intimacy and closing the distance with your partner. Once you realise how you are sabotaging your relationship, you can start making positive changes that will help you develop a rock-solid bond.
The 5 Belief Patterns that Can Hurt Relationships
.
5 Belief Patterns That Can Hurt Relationships:
Belief Pattern #1: * The Resenter
.
In a relationship, this person is ready to offer up special dinners, back rubs, and basically do any favour before even asked. They love to give, hoping that they will receive love and approval in return. However, if they do not get their specific needs met, they will grow resentful and doubt the relationship.
.
They will benefit from giving a little less and receiving a little more. Making sure that they ask for what they need as well as being able to say no to what isn’t good for them will help them feel appreciated without feeling like they were taken advantage of.
.
5 Belief Patterns That Can Hurt Relationships:
Belief Pattern #2: *The Rejecter
.
This person chases the illusion of perfection. They require not only themselves but their relationship to be just right. When life turns messy, they are either fixing it, or pushing others awaywhen they can’t. Letting anyone else see their shortcomings is inconceivable, and they end up rejecting others before they can be judged for their faults.
.
This person must be more relaxed about their idea of perfection and know that others will not reject them based on superficial details. Allowing things to be “good enough” will allow them open up to others and let them know they are loved – even for their faults.
.
5 Belief Patterns That Can Hurt Relationships:
Belief Pattern #3:
* The Controller
.
While this person is extremely capable, they tend to think that everyone else is inadequate. They micro-manage and distrust others to the point where they are left holding all the responsibility. This confirms their suspicion that they can’t depend on anyone else, and they push others away in order to avoid disaster.
.
If this type can just let go of the reins and trust someone else’s capabilities, they will have more support and not feel so alone. By accepting that there is more than one way to do things – and that they can’t possibly be in charge all the time – they can open up to the possibility of others showing them admiration and affection.
.
5 Belief Patterns That Can Hurt Relationships:
Belief Pattern #4:
* The Escaper
.
Due to a belief that the real world is dangerous, they often find themselves retreating into a safe
daydream. Since they spend more time checked out than present with their partner, they seem flaky and undependable and can become isolated in the end.
.
To cultivate a true relationship, this person needs to realise that they can cope with difficulty without retreating within themselves. They will feel safer in this world if they can stay present long enough to see that others will support and love them for who they are in the real world – not in a fantasy.
..
5 Belief Patterns That Can Hurt Relationships:
Belief Pattern #5:
* The Taker
.
Someone who feels that they will never get enough often asks for too much from others. This person is constantly asking for things like attention, time or emotions, yet is never really satisfied. People get sucked dry and eventually push them away, leaving them more depleted and empty.
.
It is crucial for this type to be more self-sufficient and less demanding of their partner. When they
realize that they have an infinite source of love already within, they will easily share it through their sweet nature, rather than demanding it from others.[/color-box]
In each of these scenarios there is a desire for love and approval, but the inner beliefs of each type build a defense or barrier that actually produces the opposite effect.
We can all unintentionally push others away without realizing it.
When you can objectively see how your belief patterns are keeping you disconnected from those around you, you will be able to change them, thus becoming more open to a true relationship.
.
See you again soon!
